i thought i knew

I am so super lost now.

I thought I knew you. Yet, you were much more than I thought.

I thought I could talk to you. Yet, i found out that I am so lost for topics to talk to you about.

I thought I could make you happy. Yet, i discovered that there are many others that could do that too.

I thought you would feel it too, Yet i was totally, utterly wrong.

Although you might not know it, i would just like you to know that I would always be here when you need any help.

Even if I am the last person you thought of.

oh daddy

oh...i just had a arguement with my dad and it is really making me feel bad...i don't like arguing with him you know...after all he is my dad and i do love him so...

but daddy, you some times are too unreasonable!! i really have no intention of insulting you, just accidently used the wrong tone...ok..i admit i was in the wrong for using the wrong tone but why must you continue to insist that i have every intention to insult you? You are my dad..why must I insult you? so please don't misunderstand me....

YAY!

the new lap top had just arrived yesterday and it is simply GORGEOUS!! it is sliver in colour and has white linings at the side...and the best part is, i was the first to use it...MUHAHAHA....here are some pictures of it....

OK..maybe it is not the nicest lap top but good enough for me...anyway, i had went DJing with qunhui yesterday and i suddenly thought that..."hey....it is not bad OK..."

feeling the beats is really cool and my bro loves it too....oh i almost forgot to mention that i brought my bro along too....overall we enjoyed ourselves despite the rain....no topics to talk about today so i will be stopping here....update soon!

world of superfition...

Sigh....I have a lot of things that I have to pour out to...yet I can't do that to anybody...I can do to man yin but she is busy and I don't want to disturb her...



most of the time, last time, he would be the first on my list to call...at least I know that he would always be there to listen to me...but since now we are not talking to each other, I don't think it is quite possible...


anyway, one sentence that my friend told me had started me thinking....how superficial this world is...everything you see might not be what it really is in reality...I don't know why, but I feel that people in the past eras are very much genuine to each other...they do things sincerely and expect no return...


Now look at the modern world...so what we had the latest technology? So what if we can even invent toilets that cleans our butts without us doing it ourselves? Does this make the world a better place to live in? I do not think so...



If you let me choose a life in the wild with no ELECTRICITY, no TELEVISION, and no INTERNET but with SIMPLE, HONEST people to a life with HIGH-RISE BUILDINGS, with the LATEST TECHNOLOGY and BEST LIVING ENVIRONMENT but with SELF-CENTERED, SUPERFICIAL people, I would choose to live in the wild...


At least I do not have to worry every single second whether somebody is going to stab you in the back to get to what ever they are trying to get....examples....


Man A want to get a promotion but man B is in the way...
So...man A do some dirty tricks to make man B crumble...
Next thing you know, man A gets his promotion...


You often get this in serial dramas right? Not enough? OK...



Person A is good friends with person B...
But person A also has a group of close friends that she hangs out with...
Person B has some flaws...
Person A's group of friends don't like it and start to gossip about person B...
Person A joins in but continues to be a good guy in front of person B...


See...how superficial a person can get? I just understand what the world is changing into...


OK I do admit I may not be always genuine to everybody I see...but I try my best to....my concern for any of them are true and I would like them to be happy....


I must agree that this is a very subjective matter and it depends on the way you sees it...but this is my personal view and what I feel about where the world is getting to...or maybe just my world is getting too....



DISCLAIMER: the above examples are plainly from my imagination with NO relation to any events or happenings...if any of them sound familiar, it is maybe you watch too much television like me too....

memories

i swallowed a whole toothbrush full of toothpaste just now and i suddenly thought of him...well, i know i should not and I'm also advised not to, but some how or another he just automatically floats into my mind....and i can't help it....we had not been talking to each other for months now and i really have no idea why i still cannot get him off my mind...maybe it is because we were so similar and i could understand what he is going through at that period of time...



i disappointed him...we had a lot of good memories together. although they were always on the
phone...but i feel that we could relate and we talked about things that i never thought i would talk to a guy about...most importantly,he was a true friend....


yet now, i don't even know how he is doing...only hearing news about him from some other people...i knew from then we could never be friends again...i tried...don't say i had not...to tell you that i was not ready...but some how you scared me....very much indeed...and i was avoiding you...thinking it was the right thing to do....but now...i can only feel emptiness....



you were my listening ear, you were my adviser. you were my entertainer, you were my friend..



now...i would forever lost you cause i do not have the courage like you to talk things out...i regret it, however even if you turn back the time, i would still do the same things....




because I'm a coward....

the worst christmas

and i thought Christmas is a day of joy and laughter....but sad to say, i had been crying...i would like to keep the internal details so don't ask me what happened...anyway, i would like to thanks all those who sent their Christmas greetings and would like you all to know that i treasure them more than any thing else because it is a small little blessing, concern and comfort you all gave me...thank you all so much....


by the way...i received an extremely cute sms and i would like to share it with all of you by posting it here...for those who received it as an sms from me, I'm sorry to disappoint you that it was not an original yours truly thingy...however, i really thought it will have much more meaning than those boring 'MERRY X'MAS TO YOU!!' messages...so here, feed yourself with this cute one and fulfill one of the must dos of Christmas...LAUGH!!




*sms

sending you a musical X'MAS sms......






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"SILENT NIGHT"



haha...cute??i thought it was too...hope all of you enjoyed it!! MERRY CHRISTMAS!! =]

G.R.E.A.T

to new comer of blog...

why must you presume that you are the only source that makes me so unhappy although many things of which that hurt me in the greatest ways were caused by you.



well i would like you to know that many things can't be back to normal even if you suddenly feel really sorry and want things back the same way...



lets see...when you break a mirror will you ever get back one perfect one with no lines of destruction before, even if you try your very best to save it?well if that does not make you see, here's another example...


try stabbing someone in the heart then do CPR on him/her in which your next step is to send him/her to the hospital...do you think the person will survive?well if you are lucky and the person is fated to live longer,will you think he/she will be the same person back again?


i am not going to be that bad as to not forgive you...after all you apologised?but i would most probably think that it is impossible for us to be friends again...we have not been talking for AGES and i would think everybody knows that we are enemies ready...


OK maybe that last sentence might sound quite childish but who cares...


most importantly,please stop saying you are very sorry cause i would like you to know that po chu qu de shui shi shou bu hui lai de....i would forgive you but please don't ask for more? i have enough troubles up my sleeves ready....

hatred

MY PRESENCE ON EARTH IS A NUISANCE AND I SOMETIMES THINK I MIGHT AS WELL DIE. AT LEAST I KNOW THAT SOME PEOPLE MIGHT BE HAPPY ABOUT IT AND BE REJOICING AFTER I PASSED ON.

china trip

second time i blogged today??haha...maybe this will make up for not posting after so long...






a few days back i went for a trip of 6 days to china...more of like a trip of many places because you have to move out of the hotel every day and move into another later in the night...







it wasn't that bad and i kinda of enjoyed it but as you know there are always things a true Singaporean will compliant about...







LOUSY HOTEL AND FOOD!!







oh well..i really expect much because i was following a very cheap tour group...we kinda of like spent a grand total of $1500 for four people...so i really cannot expect much...sigh...







haha...but i did took a few funny pics for all you peeps to enjoy...laugh it out folks!!









deer with funny eyes








rubbish grass oil??




bad spelling






nice??haha....