dear kazaf...

To my dear friend kazaf...

seriously,

i don't know where to start.

maybe i shall begin by telling you,

i know.

if you can recall,

i do in fact read your blog

and i believe that i IQ is not bad enough to not figure out what you meant

but i was in doubt,

i did not know how to be open with you.

i was afraid.

i wondered if i told you sorry would you end our friendship

every sms and every thank you i sent you was sincere

i can swear you that

but i am really sorry to say,

he had already taken the position in my heart.

i really am very bliss to have met a guy like you

and i am also very happy for you to find your superwoman

i hope this upfront rejection would not ruin our friendship

i wish all well,

brenda

***********

you said that i had these thoughts,

"It is really unnecessary of you"

"I don't need you to come this far"

"It's like wth are you doing here?"

"Why are you getting me things?"

i am honest to say

i was disappointed that you thought this way

this was not at all the thoughts that was going through my mind

i was thinking,

"oh my tian. he really surprised me"

"how am i going to thank him?"

"that's really unexpected and sweet of him"

our stiff conversation was a result of my awkwardness 

not because i disliked you.

and another reason was because i did not want you to misunderstand

i really appreciated your drink and strepiles

it really made me feel better.

once again,

thank you

and i really mean it.